wake me when this nightmare of a life ends
by fallendrastic
Summary: They're just drowning in their dreams. / Glee girls centric.


Rachel Berry.

She had long wanted to be the fair and beautiful princess who lives happily ever after. Her dads would tuck her in at night and read her a bedtime story and she'd ask loads of questions and her fathers will only answer half of them, smirking at each other in amusement as they contained their laughter. She wouldn't mind, she'd just twirl her dark brown locks (it's so dark she thought it was black) and giggle automatically, a spark going off in her brown eyes.

She would take tap dancing lessons and singing lessons and all things artistic and smile so brightly and laugh loudly.

Rachel's perfectly fine until Quinn Fabray states that she has man hands and starts calling her "Man-Handed Berry" and she runs home and cries so much she hiccups and her chest hurts.

Her fathers file a complaint and Quinn gets in trouble. But then Rachel ends up getting nothing but nasty and angry glares from everyone and they whisper, "_tattletale_," underneath their breath and give her disapproving looks and shift away from her when she arrives. Rachel cries a little bit before she sleeps and gulps and breaths in heavily and dreams peacefully.

She always dreams of being rescued by a handsome prince.

.

Quinn Fabray.

Quinn and Rachel ironically wanted and dreamed of the same thing. Except she wouldn't have her parents to read her a bedtime story and kiss her goodnight like Rachel, she'll have to watch her elder sister, Matilda, snuggle with her boyfriend and feed him cookies affectionately. She'd creep behind the counter and peak just a little bit, watching Matilda laugh into her new boyfriends shoulder and smile widely, her pearly white teeth showing.

Quinn would ask her sister what love means, because she hears her say it to Max all the time. Matilda would then pause awkwardly, shrug for a moment before ruffling Quinn's perfectly straight hair and tell her it's what Quinn feels for her mommy and daddy. But Quinn then pauses, almost hating herself for thinking this as she grabs her gold cross and squeezes her eyes shut, and wonder if she really knows what love is. Because sometimes she'll stare at her family with a blank expression, sometimes a million emotions would swell up inside her and she'll love them a lot, but sometimes it's blank.

When she gets knocked up by the resident bad boy, she cries herself to sleep quietly every night. She'd stroke her pregnant belly occasionally, and the rush of his skin next to hers will make her head throb. Her name on his lips, and the way his eyes melts into hers causes a rush to go down her spine and her heart to beat excessively fast.

She wonders if this is love.

.

Mercedes Jones.

She'd glance at herself in the mirror and chew on her lip and say, "I'm not ugly, I'm not unattractive, I'm just..." but she wouldn't be able to fill in the sentence. Her insecurities sometimes get the best of her and she'd just blink and step back when someone calls her that horrible, hurtful, three letter word which carry so much influence on her.

She stares at her mirror and fumbles over her food and sometimes she almost sticks her finger in her mouth, but quickly pulls it back. When Mercedes realizes she's being cowardly, she toughens up and walks with her head held high, sucking in her breath and retaliating at her fingertips, completely aware of her surroundings now. She's completely prepared for an insult and makes sure she leaves laughing, smiling or holding her head held high.

It's that three letter word which always gets to her. She distances herself from others a little and when she first tries on that red and white cheerleading outfit all of the other pretty skinny cheerleaders in McKinley wear, she smiles with pride. But Mercedes when she takes it off, she gulps nervously and struggles to stay confident. She blinks, for a brief second, and admits she doesn't feel like herself in the cheerleading uniform.

And when she sings Beautiful by Christina Aguilera, she has to suck in her breath and bite her lower lip, a newfound wetness invading her eyes. It's like a patterned and endless game that she finds herself playing every day and she suddenly feels renewed and different when she steps off stage.

.

Tina Cohen-Chang.

One word: stutter. She faked the stutter a few years ago and she takes a deep breath whenever she's about to stutter, making sure it distances and repulses other people and gets her out of making a presentation. Tina's too shy and afraid to sing, and she's just known as That-Asian-Chick-Who-Wheels-Around-That-Disabled-Kid.

Whenever she hears Artie get insulted, she'd take a step forward, her eyes burning with a fierce and intimidating intensity and speak with her teeth clenched and the insides of her mouth bitten. Despite the rocky relationship she and Artie had, she never fails to defend him whenever needed. Tina spends so much time caring for others such as Mike and Artie, her parents, her friends and Glee, she forgets about herself.

She doesn't focus much on herself, she just throws on a new outfit and shows up to school in her gothic glory, linking hands with Mike and thinking about ways to make him happier. He's already happy being with her, so why let Tina waste her energy? Because she wants to, because she feels like she needs to. If she doesn't, they'll call her ungrateful and unappreciative, if she does, they'll call her overwhelming and needs to take a vacation.

She kind of gets fed up with it, but hey, that's life right? But what Tina doesn't know that it's the life she chose to live. So she'll forever be committed to making others happy, and sometimes forgetting about her own happiness.

.

Brittany Susan Pierce.

Considered a dumb blonde and makes stupid and illogical assumptions and she's automatically casted into the stereotypical dumb, scatterbrained blonde who frets about the stupidest things.

She puts on her cheerleading outfit and smiles brightly and wheels Artie around sometimes, plays with her dolls and people give her candy to please her sometimes. She'll sit next to Santana and the fierce black-headed cheerleader will outshine her most of the time, but that's all right. Brittany will make dull accusations and people'll chuckle under their breath and refuse to tell her what's so funny, like she's a five-year-old.

She wishes her grades were better, wishes that she's smarter and wittier, and wishes that people will respect her more. When she shares this with Santana, the Latina raises an eyebrow in surprise and rubs her pale shoulder, shaking her head in disapproval, almost angry that Brittany would even think that.

"You're amazing, Britt. You don't have to change." Santana says so quietly Brittany might have imagined it.

.

Santana Lopez.

Beautiful, sneaky, scheming, popular, loves trouble and diabolical. She walks with her head held high and a strut in her walk, biting her lower lip seductively as she passes by the halls. Brittany stands loyally beside her (sometimes she ditches her for Artie, going to the movies, wheeling him around, etc.) and she feels on top.

But when she joins Glee and sings in front of everyone she feels a burning passion inside of her and a genuine smile stealing her lips as she sings, her eyes automatically closing. She grumbles underneath her breath when Mr. Schuester gives the lead solo to Rachel again, or when she sees Quinn leaning into first Finn who really loved her, followed by Puck who fell completely head over heels for her and finally Sam, who's crazy for her.

Santana sucks in her breath and wonders how love feels, and how it feels to be loved. She notices Rachel and Finn smiling like they know a secret during Burt and Carol's wedding. Santana breaths in heavily and stares at her feet, wishing she was loved.

She realizes her world is made of glass, just a small, little crack with little force would make it all tumble down. She didn't want it to be this way, but what's done is done.

.

_It's all the same if everybody leaves her._

_A beautiful disaster._

_._

**It should be noted that the guy Quinn thinks she's in love with is your choice, he could be Finn or Sam or Puck or Artie or whoever. Seriously, this is getting a little... I don't know. I don't like it. Nope. Zilch. It sucks... really bad. But regardless of its lameness review, okay?**


End file.
